Irish Pub Slang
Langers - very drunk
The Black Stuff - Guinness
Naggin - a small bottle of alcohol
Locked - very drunk
Acting the maggot - fooling or messing around
Ossified - very drunk
The Good Dublin Samaritan
This bloke is in our pub in Temple Bar, really drunk. Some lads decide to be good Samaritans and get him home. So they pick him up off the floor, and drag him out the door. On the way to the car, he falls down three times. When they get to his house, they help him out of the car and, he falls down four more times. They ring the bell, and the bloke's wife looks livid. One of them says: "Here's your husband, Missus! Safe and sound." And the wife says: "Yeah right. Now where the hell is his wheelchair?"
Ireland
Hills as green as emeralds
Cover the countryside
Lakes as blue as sapphires-
And Ireland's special pride
And rivers that shine like silver
Make Ireland look so fair-
But the friendliness of her people
Is the richest treasure there
An Old Irish Blessing
May love and laughter light your days,
and warm your heart and home.
May good and faithful friends be yours,
wherever you may roam.
May peace and plenty bless your world
with joy that long endures.
May all life's passing seasons
bring the best to you and yours!
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